Fear is not Real

Children are fearless. We adults are the ones who create and influence fear in them.
  
I write this note for I have seen many who make up stories which creates fear on a child, lines like 'halika na, may multo dyan' (come now there are ghosts there). It has become a sure way of making a child behave.

I will discount traumatic experiences and environmental causes, because those itself create anxiety. Creating a scene where the child will imagine the worst may create phobias in adult life.I have only later realized the connection of childhood stories to an adult's fear.
I traced how some developed fear of ghosts, dead, dark or insects, all have similar stories to tell, fear was taught during childhood.

As I end with a quote from a fictional character in a sci-fi movie: Fear is not real. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may never exist...danger is very real but fear is a choice.

Communicating with your Child

Anger when not addressed properly will create havoc in everyone's home
I have attended a workshop that has given valuable information to effectively listen, understand and impart our message effectively.

These are elaborately discussed but here are the key points:

• Start with calmness & intention- be thankful, pray for patience & polish self-confidence

• When patience runs low : Pause,  straighten your body & breathe, speak softly & sweetly, try to find your quiet place and meditate

• Personality Profile, identify oneself and children, and you will understand one's behavior.  (In the workshop, we were grouped and had questionnaires to assess ourselves and our kids)

• Task Oriented, Leaders-  agree & explain how to get the task done
• Organized, Logical Thinking- discuss the  process of things
• Playful & Social Leaders - approach in a playful manner
• Kind presence , a mediator - a sweet & gentle approach

• Understand  yourself and the Child's Modality, approach with words and actions 
• Visual - 'As you can see', 'Please look'
• Auditory - 'As you can hear', 'Please listen'
• Kinesthetic - sensitive with feelings, ' Can you feel;' or relate with emotion 

• Elements in Communication : Clear + Congruent + Pro-Active
• state your purpose, say what you want your child to do , not what NOT to do, don't say DON'T

• Words to Remember
• Yes + And + Because

Giving Variation to the Traditional Letter Puzzle

Most kids easily get tired of their toys, one has to innovate to keep them constantly interested.

Traditional ABC puzzle has kept my daughter busy. We even diversified and made a house with a gate using these mats.

But what made my daughter leap for joy is when her dad made a box that transforms himself and our little daughter into a  robot !